Potential Problems in Communication
Before we move on, browse thru the list below and recognize some of the problems men face when communicating with women :
- Taking rejection personally.
More often than not, when a girl rejects you, the reason may not be related to you. There are 1001 reasons for rejecting a guy so don't take a rejection personally, she could just be having a bad day or she may be already seeing someone else or she may have just ended a relationship and is not looking for a new one. Whatever the reason, it is unlikely that you'll know, therefore it is pointless to get worked up or upset over a rejection.
- Comparing yourself with other men.
Every individual is unique, no 2 person is the same, so quit comparing yourself with the guy next door and focus instead on your strength. Comparing yourself with other men is not going to put you in their shoes. So, stop wasting time and use it to do something that is more productive instead, like improving your social skills.
Some men lie to women because of their own insecurities. Guys like that believe that they cannot get a woman unless they pretend to be someone else. Lying is a short term measure and those lies are going to catch up with you someday and that, dude is going to be a very costly price to pay; especially if the relationship is turning out to be a wonderful one! Bottom line is NEVER, EVER lie since lying will create more problem than good.
- Manipulating the women that you interact with.
Some guys have a habit of manipulating the girls they interact with. This is a very bad practice and end of the day it will affect your self-esteem simply because you have to resort to manipulation. And it would grate on your conscience that the reason that she is doing this is not out of the sheer free will but it's due to your manipulation. End of the day, you may feel guilty, terrible and a total jerk.
- Planning everything to the dot.
There are lots of things that you can plan and do the necessary to make sure that everything sticks to plan but interaction with women is something that cannot be planned and neither can you shape it to what you plan. It just doesn't work that way. You should let communication with women flow naturally and not try to force its course. Relax and enjoy each other's company and have a good time. Remember always that with women, you cannot control the outcome, so, don't bother trying!
- Don't just hear her, listen !
This is definitely a skill you have to master in order to be successful with girls. Listening to what she says will enable you to learn a great deal about her. Through listening, you'll be able to keep the conversation going as you pick up cues from her.
- Letting your frustration with women cloud your communication.
If you've just been jilted by your girl friend, don't go out and treat all other women like they are responsible for you being jilted. Failure with one woman does not condemn you to an eternity of failures. Just take it in your stride, get it over and done with and then move on. Until you let go of the anger and frustration, it's going to affect all your interaction with women.
- Being a dork and not knowing how to seize an opportunity.
Believe it or not, many guys actually let opportunities to get to know a women better pass right before their eyes! And the sad thing is after the opportunity pass, they start to lament that they SHOULD have seize the moment and push themselves to take the risk! If you are part of that crowd, better get yourself out of there and learn WHEN you should TAKE THE RISK! And not let another golden opportunity pass you by.
Those are just some of the common problems guys faced when communicating with girls. Don't let that be a stumbling block, recognize that it exist and learn how to get pass the block.
Now that you are aware of the "stumbling blocks", let's look at how you can start over come it and start "talking"