A. Most guys who foul up Romantic Questions do it by leaving out one or more of the key components of the question. A properly asked Romantic Question has three components:
- The excuse
- The description
- The question
If you are having problems, you are probably leaving out part 1 the excuse or part two the description.
Let’s look at there parts one at a time.
1. The excuse. When you ask a woman a Romantic Question, you need to start with an excuse. The “excuse” answers the question the woman will be asking herself about your question, which is, “Why is he asking me this?” If you can answer that question right away, with your excuse, it will be much easier for her to open up to you.
When you ask a Romantic Question, the “excuse” answers her natural question, “Why is he saying this to me?” It gives her a context for the question you are asking her, and that helps her relax into the interaction.
A Romantic Question standing on its own can seem invasive and scary to a woman, but when you add an excuse and a description to it, almost any question can become palpatable.
Let’s try this out on one of the most tacky questions you can ask a woman: “Do you believe in love at first sight?” You will probably agree with us that most women would hear this as a hackneyed line, which it is. We are not recommending that you use it. But let’s see what happens when we add an excuse to it.
Which question do you think it would be easier for a woman to relax and answer: “Hey, do you believe in love at first sight?” or “I’ve been talking to my friends about this, and sort of taking an informal survey. Do you think people can fall in love at first sight?”
Once again we aren’t recommending such an overused line, but it’s worth noticing that the second form of this question would be easier for a woman to answer. That’s because it has an excuse attached to it. The woman can say to herself, “Oh, he’s asking me this because he’s been talking about it to his friends. Okay.” She can then stop worrying about why you are asking her this, and is more likely to let herself get into answering the question.
2. The Description. The “description” part of a romantic question helps guide the woman to the kind of answer you are looking for. It also describes the kind of feelings you want her to imagine having while she is answering the question.
Let’s add a description to our test question, “Do you believe in love at first sight?”: “I’ve been talking to my friends about this, and sort of taking an informal survey. It seems like sometimes you meet someone, and there’s just an immediate click, do you know what I mean? Like, ‘Oh, it’s you,’ even though you’ve never met before. So I’ve been wondering, do you think people can fall in love at first sight?”
The description we added to this romantic question was, “It seems like sometimes you meet someone, and there’s just an immediate click, do you know what I mean? Like, ‘Oh, it’s you,’ even though you’ve never met before.” This description starts describing the feeling you want her to feel, and also guides her toward the kind of answer you are looking for. Once again, it’s worth noticing that even a question as tacky as “Do you believe in love at first sight” can start seeming downright interesting when you add an excuse and description to it.
3. The question. The “question” is simply the romantic question itself in our example, “Do you think people can fall in love at first sight?” Once again, let’s look at the Romantic Question in its entirety. Notice how much more normal-sounding and less taky the question is when the excuse and description are in place. Then think about how well this would work with a question that hasn’t already been beaten to death in every bar in western civilization:
“I’ve been talking to my friends about this, and sort of taking an informal survey. It seems like sometimes you meet someone, and there’s just an immediate click, do you know what I mean? Like, ‘Oh, it’s you,’ even though you’ve never met before. So I’ve been wondering, do you think people can fall in love at first sight?”
Romantic questions push the conversation into a romantic direction. When you ask a Romantic Question, you are taking things to a more intimate level. You need to be respectful of that fact, by setting up your questions in the most non-invasive way that you can. The way you do that is by having an excuse and a description before you ask your romantic question.
Lets look at some examples.
The Romantic Question: “What makes your heart flutter?”
The full, three-part way of asking it:
“I was thinking the other day about how amazing it is to be moved to the point where your heart flutters. Maybe you’ve seen a piece of artwork, or heard some music, and it’s like the passion just builds in you, and you feel it so intensely in your heart. I’d be curious to know, what makes your heart flutter? What’s an example in your life of that?”
The Romantic Question: “Have you ever met someone and felt like you were meeting them again for the first time?”
Once again, you wouldn’t just dump this question on her without preparation. So you might say:
“I was talking to some friends the other night over dinner, and we were talking about the feeling of when you meet someone and feel like you’ve known them before. One person was really into the past life thing, and I wasn’t sure what to think about that. I’ve certainly had those experiences where you meet someone and you look at him or her and you feel like you’ve known them before. It’s like you’re meeting them again, rather than for the first time. Do you know what I mean? So, I’d be curious to know, if you be willing to share about it. Have you ever met someone and felt like you’ve met them before?”
Keep these steps in mind, and your Romantic Questions will build a better and romantic connection between you.
||Ron Louis and David Copeland are dating coaches and authors of the best selling “How to Succeed with Women” and the creators of Seduction Techniques
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