I’ve told you before that you need to put a woman to work for you when you’re not around. (No, I don’t mean changing the car oil or moving your barbells up to the attic.) I call this effect “marinading” her, because what you’re attempting to do is to make her think about you while you’re not around, which furthers your seduction even when you’re not there. It’s like having a sum of money in a special account that earns extra interest – if you’ll only say the right passwords when you make the deposit.
You see, sleeping with a woman on the first date takes a great deal of skill. It’s not always possible or necessary to invest an intense amount of effort in a single woman you’ve just met so that you can get her into bed on the first night. Sometimes it works, but sometimes not. You’ve got many factors working against you :
- Her trust must be satisfied
- Her attraction must be pushed through the roof
- Her social inhibitors must be overcome
- Her friends (another kind of social inhibitor) must be removed from the equation
Add to that the fact that you’ve got a good 20-25% chance of catching her on her period, and … well, it’s not a slam dunk, is it? I haven’t even gone into the droves of sensory stimulation and seduction talk you have to engage in to start her engine.
Add to this the fact that you’ve got to pull it off 100% perfectly on the first attempt, because once you go for the slam-dunk, you almost never get another shot at the hoop with this girl again.
So, while you can work your abilities up to the level of a skilled seducer, your best bet is to be just patient enough to get to your goal, but in the shortest time necessary. (As you get skilled with The Seduction Method, you’ll find that time shortening as you gain experience.)
One of the best ways to do this is to get her attraction working for you between the times that you see her. I call this technique :
“Plant The Seed”
What you want to do is to mention something to her on the first meeting that will keep her mind working in your favor. This is the “seed” that you’re going to plant, and she’s going to water it for you while you’re away. When you get back together with her, you’ll find that you’ve got a sapling that’s started to sprout.
Here’s how it’s done :
Let’s say you’re deep in discussion with Mona, the perky brunette at the bar. You’ve been talking about a few interesting topics, such as your favorite cars (since she happens to be a car nut.) You talk about classic cars, exotic cars, SUVs, etc. And you’ve established that she really is a car freak and not just playing along with you. You take the opportunity to talk about a fairly common but respectable car (a BMW, for example).
You should bring up the details of the car so that she’s really seeing and experiencing the car. “I’ve always loved that logo, with the circle and the blue, it’s just so sleek. And the way those doors just seem to be machined perfectly to open and shut so smoothly. The wheels even have a distinct look and hum that just gives you a little tingle in the back of your neck …”
Blah blah blah. Load it with sensory information so she can get emotionally charged about it.
The point of that sensory detail is to get her to really associate you with the vehicle, so that she can’t help but think of you when she encounters a BMW again.
“Wow, Mona, you actually know your stuff on autos,” you say. “I’ve been thinking about picking up a used BMW for a decent price. You don’t know anyone that’s selling one, do you?”
She might say that she does know someone, which is fine because you can turn that into a follow-up with her later, and she’ll still be thinking about you when you ask her to get you the seller’s information.
More likely, though, is that she will tell you: “No, I don’t know anyone selling one right now.”
Your reply: “Well, if you do see any BMW’s for sale, keep me in mind, okay?”
Now at this point, you should have already established some interest on her part through prior conversation. You can then pull out a pen and paper.
“As a matter of fact, do you have email? Here write it down so we can stay in touch.” And then get her to write down her phone number as well.
Now, what’s going to happen every time she sees a BMW from this point on? That’s right. She’s going to think of YOU. It doesn’t matter if the BMW is for sale or not, she’s going to have a trigger in her thoughts that go right back to you. When you described it in detail to her, you got her to really associate the noticeable characteristics of the car to you. She saw it in her mind’s eye, and when she sees it in real life, she’ll experience that again and think of you. It’s the same premise as the person who buys a certain kind of car and then starts to see everyone on the street with the same kind.
I recommend you only plant the seed if you are 90% sure that you’ve got her interest. Otherwise, it’s wasted effort. You also want to plant it near the end of the conversation so that you’ve left off at an unresolved topic, AND you’ve set it up perfectly to get her email and/or phone number.
Another method of planting the seed is to think of some common experience and get her to associate it in the same way you did the BMW. You have to get clever here and think of a common experience that you can associate strongly enough with you that she will remember you later. Maybe it’s something like yawning in a meeting. You joke with her: “Don’t you hate it when someone near you yawns? Then you yawn, and everyone else that sees you starts to copy you. I bet just talking about yawning is starting to make you want to yawn, eh?”
If you leave off the meeting on a positive note, and you can make a couple yawning references, she’ll now be reminded of you the next time she sees someone yawn. The trick there is to just make it funny and interesting enough that she will not easily forget it. Anchor the joke again at the end of the conversation, but don’t overdo it.
Choose something that’s fairly common, but not too common, because it has to occur almost randomly to her later instead of feeling too planned or contrived. If you joke about coughing or blinking, that’s a bit too common.
Remember, women WANT to be thinking about you and wondering when they’ll see you again, etc. This is the tortuous part of seduction that they LOVE. Don’t rip them off! The more you can work her interest up, the better.
Now, the psychology of a woman is not so different when it comes to attraction. You see, men and women respond to similar strategies when it comes to our relationship and sexual attraction patterns. That’s right, the things I advise you to do here will probably work for women as well.
Let’s think about this :
If you were to spend your day at the lake fishing, without any idea of what to buy or bring to catch fish, how well do you think you’d do?
Probably not too well. Even if you had the good sense to buy a fishing pole, some hooks, and bait, you really don’t know any of the skills involved in catching fish. Would you know what strength line to buy? Which kinds of lures work on which fish? Where they swim? How deep? How to reel them in without having them pop off the hook? Would you have the slightest idea how to clean and gut them so you could eat them? Which ones taste good and which are awful?
And, honestly, fishing is not a complicated pastime. There’s not a lot of variables at work here. (No offense to the guys out there in hip-waders)
Now, imagine the world of dating and seduction. If you were to go out night after night without any idea of what equipment to use, or how to bait your line, or how to reel them in … how successful do you think you’d be?
The truth is that most guys go out all the time and end up doing nothing more than shooting the odds, and reinforcing bad habits without ever learning anything new. They throw the same old bait out time after time without stopping to see if they are being effective. They go out time after time after time, not figuring out what works and why, and beat their heads against the wall.
I see it all the time.
In fact, I used to DO that all the freakin’ time.
Finally, I caught on to what was happening. I started taking notes on what I was doing, as well as having the epiphany I think you’ve all read about at the Seduction Method website. When things fell into place, it was a classic “Oh, sh*t!” experience.
Once you see (and feel) the attitudes that breed success, you can never go back. It’s like having your eyes opened to a whole new way of looking at the world.
Remember, NO ONE is going to seek you out and teach you these things! You’re going to do one of three things: 1) Learn because you had the sense to invest in your own development, 2) Learn because you end up getting the crap kicked out of you by the women out there, or 3) Never learn.
I’ve been out there for a long time, getting knocked around the head, and it got pretty painful at times. I don’t know where I came up with the strength to keep trying sometimes, but I did. One thing I promised myself as I was going through the effort was that if I was able to figure this out, I’d have to pass the information along to my friends, and fellow Don Juans all over the world.
You need to have this information, but I know there’s a part of you that may be afraid.
Yes, afraid. You see, as men, we’ve been brainwashed into thinking that
- We’re men, and that’s enough to get women, and
- We should already know everything we need to attract women.
We’re taught that if we’re not being successful, it’s THEIR fault. “I just can’t understand WOMEN.” “WOMEN are so different.” “I just don’t get why WOMEN act so strangely.”
The truth is that women are acting just fine. We men are not learning enough about THEIR motivations, or what actually is going on beneath the surface.
That’s where The Seduction Method comes in. Imagine getting 300 pages of top-quality advice and in-depth strategies to turn your game around with women. Wouldn’t that be the ultimate addition to any man’s library ?
Think about all the magazines you get now, and add up all the advice you’ve gotten from them that has ever helped you in your dating life.
Carlos Xuma
Author for Seduction Method ebook
