When Boy Meets Girl
How does a fellow get to meet a girl he likes ?
Is a question many boys ask. Girls who have to use subtle approaches think a boy has no real problem in this direction. But what a boy really wants to know is how to operate so that his advances won't be rebuffed.
Traditionally, a boy asks a mutual acquaintance to introduce him to a girl he wants to meet. He takes it from there, usually with an invitation to a date that will further their acquaintance.
In modern settings it's not always easy to find a go-between. Fortunately, today it's no longer necessary. If a boy and girl attend the same school or classes, or belong to the same club, that in itself constitutes an introduction. If Janet goes to a different school, then Ted can try attending one or more of her school's functions in an effort to meet her.
The hardest moment, perhaps, comes when a couple are finally face to face. If a boy is an outgoing type of person to whom friendly pleasantries come readily, then it's easy. He'll find the right little compliment to pay a girl, the right opening remarks.
But the shy, inexperienced boy-and he is legion-will find these first efforts at gallantry very trying. Such a boy ought to plan ahead of time just what he will say to a girl. Even then he may not follow through with his plan; tension may erase every rehearsed word from his mind and he may end up blurting out an abrupt invitation that startles the girl.
But if she is sensitive and interested, she overlooks his clumsiness and encourages him with her acceptance, knowing that experience will take the rough edges off her new friend's manner.
Meeting a strange girl in a strange place can really give a boy stage fright. This time he had no chance to rehearse; suddenly he's expected to do and say the right things.
It's no wonder that he gets tongue-tied. (Of course, later on, in long solitary post-mortems, he can think of the most brilliant, most witty conversation.) That's why it's a good idea for beginning daters to develop a few little formulas to use when words fail.
A good opener, for instance, would be: "Didn't I meet you at the Joneses?" Or a boy might make a comment that linked them to a common friend or interest.
He could also ask a girl where she hails from, what brought her to this place, how she spells her name, or how long she has known the person who introduced them. Such simple little icebreakers that get conversation rolling are worth developing.
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