How To Take Advantage of Literal Meanings
An interesting aspect of every language is the extension of the vocabulary’s literal meanings. We speak according to a set of social rules and use various meanings of English vocabulary accordingly.
This technique could be very powerful if you do it right and not excessive.
It is very simple and easy to follow. You can create funny sentences by using the words creatively yet conforming to the grammar.
For example, the word “call”--it can mean either “telephone” or “refer to”.
So next time she says, “Call me a taxi/doctor”, you can simply call her “a taxi”. (e.g. “okay, you are a taxi/doctor”) and if she says she’ll go “window shopping” with her girlfriends, inquire how many windows she needs to buy.
And next time she asks you, “How are you feeling?” tell her the truth—-you know, perhaps you happen to be hungry or horny.
You may have heard of that famous “riddle”--“Can you say the capital of all fifty states in less than a minute?” (Can you say “the capital of all fifty states” in less than a minute? The answer is 2 seconds.)
Another classic example is “not to tell” something. The implication of not telling something is that it is a secret and should not be let known.
There are two ways to joke about this:
- State you can’t tell her/someone else that (reveal the thing) (e.g. “I can’t tell you that she made fun of you yesterday”)
- State you can’t tell her something while that something is false. (e.g. “I’m not allowed to say that my family is very rich.” “Why not? It’s nothing to be ashamed of.” “Mainly, because we ain’t rich.” (You can substitute all kinds of things here including the size of your manhood to get her to think sexually after you’ve known each other for some time.)
A handy preposition is “in”. So if next time she asks you to join her in a cup of coffee you can reply, “sure, if there is enough room.” Or if she says, “Yesterday I talked to John in my pajamas.” You can ask her, “How did he get in your pajamas?”
Girls like to ask: “what kind of husband or boyfriend should I get?” Just tell them, “Don’t touch other people’s husbands or boyfriends. Go get a single guy.”
If you are good at public speaking and next time somebody asks you whether you have stage fright, you can reply, “Believe me, it’s not the stage that frightens me; it’s the whole audience that scares the hell out of me.”
If you keep looking out, the possibilities are endless. Put a small notebook
in your pocket and when you come across any funny lines or words, just write it
down. Then, you can create your own set of humorous lines that nobody has.
To learn more, get Martin
Merrill's How to Make Woman Laugh
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